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How Do Engineers Handle Breakups?

Just like calculus, no matter how much you try to derive—you just can’t solve that damn equation

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Engineers Handle Breakups

It’s never easy to get over a break-up. Some would say otherwise, but there will always be a memory of that certain person that once shared part of themselves with you—and it sticks with you for some time, whether you like it or not.

They say that to be able to handle a break up, one must be strong—but sometimes “strong” doesn’t really cut it. I mean, we can’t just take 3 deep breaths and tell ourselves that we’re okay instantly. What we need to be is “resilient”.

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“re·sil·ient adjective. (of a substance or object) able to recoil or spring back into shape after bending, stretching, or being compressed.” That’s according to Google.

After a break up, we will get hurt and mourn (bent, stretched, compressed) and we have to accept the mourning process—it’s part of moving on. But after that step, we have to learn to get back up and move on and here are some of the things resilient engineers do.

They Rediscover and Reinvent Themselves

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They spend time with the people or do things that really matters to them, like going on family dates, playing music, or chilling out on a road trip with your besties and buds, or probably catching up with good friends you haven’t seen in a long time since you were with your ex. If you’re the career-loving type, then spend more time doing well on your job and get that promotion you’ve always wanted.

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They Mourn in Fractals

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Like I said in the introduction, being strong—or pretending to be—just won’t cut it. Instead of trying to be tough or burying your feelings, allow yourself to feel it all.

Call in sick, or opt to work from home. If you’re still a student, try to miss a day or two and borrow notes from a friend. If any of these aren’t possible, make sure to make time for yourselves to let it all out—whether it be after school or work. Opt not to go out with some colleagues and friends until you’ve brought out all your tears and frustrations. Crying will help you get a grip of yourself, and help you get through those 5 stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.

They Binge Solve


Engineers love to solve, there’s no denying that. Even if they say they don’t like it, after 5 (or more years) they’ve spent in engineering school, once they see any sort of problem, their brain is already automatically trying to solve it.

So, to get rid of some residual or unnecessary feelings—or if they simply want to forget even just for a while, resilient engineers preoccupy themselves with puzzles, mind games, challenging projects at work, debunking Einstein’s theory of Relativity, or even solving the mysteries of the universe.

They Spend Time with Friends

Spending time with friends is always a part of moving on. Sometimes, when you’re in a relationship, one way or another, you’ll spend less time with your friends. Now that you’ve broken up, it’s a good time to reconnect with your friends to catch up with everything you’ve missed. Don’t go flirting with any of them or anyone yet though, give yourself time to relax, enjoy and breathe.

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They Accept and Move on

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Just like those problems on your calculus test paper, wherein no matter how much you try to derive and reset your calculator—you just can’t solve that damn equation without remembering that stupid formula. What do we do? We accept that we can’t solve it, and move on to the next question.

Just accept it, and move on. Learn from your mistakes and do better the next time.

I hope this helps, even just a bit. We engineers need to stick together, so if there’s anything you could add to these, leave a comment.

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Engr. Amy Aguirre
Civil Engineer, fashion model & GineersNow TV host. Speaks Spanish, English and Portuguese fluently. Based in Melbourne and Manila. Follow me on Linkedin


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